Tuesday, June 5, 2012


heard from doctor when I pulled into garage after my workout at the gym and shopping trips to Stop and Shop, Home Depot and Campbell's farmstand. 

She said that they don't see much new on the CT scan Backus did...one "nodule" that had disappeared on their scans seems to be back again.  Why do they say "nodule?"  Why can't they say tumor?  They have all these euphemisms for tumor--"nodule"; "lesion"; "hyper density" and "hyper enhancement"--use language I can understand, damnit! 

Anyway, she said that there seems to be something going on..."brewing" is the word I used.  The fluid (ascites) is a concern...that's something new.  Most likely there are changes that the CT scan can't pick up yet. 

I told her I wanted to go on the clinical trial drugs.  She has to study the protocol and "do the math" to figure out when I can start the new chemo.  I have to wait 28 days from the last time I took the old clinical trial drug, Everolimus, which was on Thursday.   I may also have to have another CT scan before I start the drugs.  My CA 125 is now up to 218....it's going up steadily...so things are not good in there.

I'm hoping I don't have chemo until the first week of August...just in time for my 63rd birthday.  If I have it the end of this month, it will be complicated.  We will be staying in the RV in Lisbon...I'll need someone to drive me home from chemo AND someone to stay with the dogs in the RV...I can't leave them there alone...what if they barked the whole time?  So, Jean will have to dog sit and Sandy will have to drive me...or Sandy can drive me and the dogs can come along for the ride.  I don't need Sandy to sit with me the whole time...she can sit out in the car with the dogs and make sure they are okay.

So that's the story, Morning Glory...I'm still waiting to get the "math question" answered and to find out if I have to go for yet another CT scan.  I'll be willing to bet that I start this treatment on June 28th.  

I have my questions answered...the ones I cared about.  And the answer is:  the cancer is back and growing...somewhere that isn't totally showing up on CT scan...so it's not THAT big.  One of the drugs I'll be taking is a biological agent that responds to a different marker than Avastin, so it won't be like taking the drug that didn't work; and the other drug is a known chemo drug that has had some success against ovarian cancer.  A one-two punch.  It's not a blind study, I know I will be getting both drugs, no placebos in this study.  YAY!

Now we get back to planning that trip to Freeport for dock-diving the weekend after next and getting stuff picked out for the bathroom remodel.  In other words, the important things in life.



Tami said...

I know full well the ups and downs of this ride. Your sense of humor does help, but the the fear of the unkown can still be crippling at times and if you're in need of an experienced, loving and extemely concerned friend you need look no further than me. T.

Ann Miller said...

Thanks Tami, you are one of the great ones I have met on this journey. Don't worry, I'm still kicking! I do have my moments, though, every once in awhile. I get over them fast.

Terry Coney said...

Just wanted to say that you have always been someone I wish I could be. So strong and fearless. Full of humor when most would cry. I love you Ann Miller..Just plain and simple. :o)